the one where i got an agent...
journey to my book deal, part one
a little bit of background
Okay, so am I sitting here a year after finding an agent typing this? Yes. Do you technically know how this story ends? Yes. Are you going to sit here and take the ride with me anyway?
So where does this start? Do I wax nostalgic about how I’ve been reading since I was three, when my mother found me on the top bunk in my shared bedroom sounding out letters and forcing myself through sheer willpower to read? I could. It’s true, but I actually don’t think it’s totally relevant.
I mean, I’ve been reading a long time. I was the hyper fixated ass kid who had to read the 800-page book in one sitting. That was it. There was no in-between with me. And I’m still kind of like that now, even as a writer. I write 5,000 words or I write nothing.
So that’s background on me. I didn’t have a WattPad and didn’t submit stories online (my mom really didn’t let me on the internet like that, y’all. I know. It was a struggle). But I did write. I wrote in notebooks. I drew maps of worlds that didn’t exist. I created stories over and over again for as long as I could remember.
Which means of course I thought it was a great idea to go to college for a degree in medicine (that I very obviously did not end up pursuing lol) but that’s a story for another day.
so I started querying right and…
I will not lie to y’all. I went in blind. I don’t know what has been up with me in the past decade and just jumping into things without making myself aware of the odds—I did it with my MFA degree by only applying to three places and not making myself aware that getting into a fully funded MFA program was near impossible, but it worked out so there’s that—but I jumped into querying without much research beyond:
how to write a good query letter
how to write a good synopsis
how to write good pitches
In other words, I didn’t make myself aware of the odds. So, I did things through pure, unadulterated chaos.
TLDR; I sent like 50 queries the first day.
Which was, in hindsight, a bad idea. BUT BUT, it worked out right? Look where I am now! *gestures wildly*
Anywhoooo, I looked into MSWLs and sent a humongous buttload of queries all at once, then sent like 20 more two days later. And that was it. That was not, and is not, a recommended way of doing things. Don’t be me.
My query was not all that. Well, I mean it had to be at least relatively good because I had around 42% request rate. Which does not sound impressive to some people BUT again, I did not do this with the best of rhyme or reason. I had agents in there that I really wanted to work with, at agencies I admired, and I thought about that part, but goodness I would have sent in smaller batches and sent in waves if I’d thought it through.
Anyway, I sent my first query at the beginning of May, and I’m not some magic story where I got all these requests right away. I did get some from the faster agents, but many trickled in. I was excited when I got my first full request! Why?
Well, my book feels and is a bit niche. I have a black, male, autistic main character and he plays a sport. I knew that was going to hold me back a lot. I also was unfailingly open about my neurodiversity in my bio, and I anecdotally heard that could be a factor as well in request rate and what agents considered when working on you. Can’t be sure about that, but that’s what I’d heard.
So, to see people requesting this book with this very specific intersection of identities was exciting and gave me hope.
and then…
The first full rejection was bad, but it was also hopeful. My very first full rejection gave me very actionable feedback on my draft that I felt was helpful BUT here’s the problem. I had already sent out all these queries. In my case, I had also already sent out all these fulls to agents when I now had this great feedback that I couldn’t really apply. I decided to quietly start making edits and cross the bridge later when I got there or, if and when, I needed to start sending more queries.
The second rejection was an R&R that I got in July which was exciting. It was from a newer agent at an established agency who seemed super nice and I seemed like a good fit for her list. She gave me a ton of good feedback and seemed excited about the R&R and I started to revise in earnest now, eager to get my book revised and in good shape.
A few more rejections rolled in, many of them form, one of them with NO MESSAGE ATTACHED AT ALL! (RUDE!). And some more with similar feedback as the R&R. It is now August and I am feeling a little bit put out. All of these requests, many still out, and nothing really biting.
I’m about halfway through my edits and losing steam and motivation when I get a string of rejections back to back one week that really take the air out from under me. I know that sounds so ungrateful right? I had only been querying for three months, I really had no space to feel so hopeless when others query for years, but I felt that way and couldn’t help it.
In any case, I plugged along on edits, got a few more full requests and held off as I edited the manuscript to send the newest version. Then, I got an email that I ignored. I figured it was another rejection and it had been a really hard week so I couldn’t deal. I let that email sit for exactly 5 hours before I finally had the heart to check it.
And there it is, an agent gushing about my work. An agent saying super nice things about my book. Saying they love it, they want to see more work from me, and they want to schedule a call.
This was it.
So of course, I freak out a little bit. I call my sister and my mom. I call my husband. I scream into a pillow, then I send my WIPs over to the agent and start prepping. I know usually here is where people send a few more queries out but I didn’t do that. I genuinely felt I had sent all my queries to the people I had wanted to at that point and it was just seeing who would respond. I still had outstanding partials and queries and fulls so I was just excited to see what would happen next.
the call(s).
Why plural? Well, spoiler alert. I get multiple offers BUT let’s start at square one.
The first call goes good. I think. I don’t know. The agent was a nice. A little awkward, but she had Big 5 sales and was at an established agency. She gushed about my book and I could tell it really spoke to her. She had been involved with children on the spectrum before and really connected on a personal level. It seemed perfect. She offered on the call.
So now I had work to do right? Things to send off, people to talk to, I was now a big bad author with a big bad offer! So I first contacted the agent I was doing the R&R for. She wanted to know if the offering agent offered not he version she requested the R&R for and I said yes. She offered immediately in response in the email and scheduled a call.
At that point I was a little shocked. I expected her to step aside but I did let her know I was halfway through edits and feeling good about them and she let me know she didn’t want to lose my book. We did a call and suddenly, I’m confused because wow do I click with her. She’s amazing, she gets me and she gets this book and has a larger vision for it. I also know she’d be great because duh, already doing edits right?
Then, something funny happens. An agent who has a partial requests the full but I want to send this new version. This agent is at a really good agency and I really want to work wither because her MSWL seems on point and a good fit with me. I bang out the rest of the revisions in a day and send her the full, letting her know it’s a little bit different than what she’s already seen. She accepts and I think maybe it’s a long shot. It’s the same agency that one of my favorite authors is signed to. There’s no way.
I wait and then suddenly, there it is.
I schedule the call and it goes about as perfectly as a call can possibly go. Her editorial vision is amazing. Her ideas are going to push this book to greater heights. She likes my other ideas. She reps everything I write. I know instinctively, on the call, that this is my agent.
I am close to decision time and gearing up to be done when suddenly I get an email from another agent. Someone who has been missing email notifications. Someone who really wants to take a look at the book. They’re coming under the wire but I send the full just in case.
Decision day comes around and I wait on this last agent with the full. There’s at least two other agents with fulls as well, but at this point it’s the last day and I figure, okay I got ghosted. It’s 6 pm. I send my offer decision to my agent. I feel good about it.
Then, exactly one minute later, I get this email.
Now how is that fair? I just sent off my decision and this agent comes along saying some of the nicest things I have ever had said about my book. I actually doubted myself for a second, but I let the agent know I had already decided. She was so sweet and even left the door open to keep in touch which was amazing.
I knew in my heart that regardless, I had made the right decision. I signed and then boom! I was agented.
Then the hard work began.
Hard work meaning totallyrevisingandoverhaulingabout2/3sofmybooktogetreadyforsub but… that’s a story for the next one. :)